swinger update

I have been in contact with Swinger and tied up the lose ends. Basically he says that he went quiet because he didn't want to hurt me and he could tell that my feelings for him were growing. He isn't very good at goodbyes so he cut me off so I could get on with my life without him.

'the reason I went quiet on you is because, in my opinion, it would have been the best way for you to maybe not forget me but at least let go of the feelings that you were getting'.

I kind of figured that this was part of it. but even when we were seeing each other I always got the impression he was in deeper than he wanted to be. He didn't behave like someone who didn't have feelings. I certainly didn't have to initiate contact or persue him in any way it was always him. I was trying to be cool and nonchalant, obviously not very well. He was always protesting that he didn't want to get involved as he had recently been hurt. but his actions were much louder than his words, which I teased him about numerous times. I think this says it all.

'I, like you, have been hurt too much in the past and I am not prepared to put myself through it again.' (thats the difference between us .....he isn't prepared to run the risk of a woman hurting him again,whereas I am prepared to accept hurt as part of living).

we have now cleared the air as it were and now we can be friends without pressure, he says he is not in this country and won't be coming back here to live but would still like to see me when he comes over to england. I told him he still owes me a game of ten pin bowling.