my big date

took us to here

which is where this happened

after a lot of this which caused these

we drove around so that we could see lots of these

I

showed him where this is

before we went for one of these

here

which led to this

which was very

until eventually we had to give in to hunger and go for one of these

he is back home now and has text me

'a very special day'

he has warned me that seeing him will be very irratic for a time. But he is trying to arrange his work so that he works from UK more in the future.

I now know that I was right to believe in him we are sooooo

this is how we both feel right now

100 posts

I have been tagged by pixie to do this it also happens to be post 100 on this blog

8 passions in my life

my four boys
my music
my writing
my reading
fresh air
my computer
my friends
compassion


8 things to do before I die

ride in a hot air balloon
ride in a helicopter
learn to ride a horse (I have a fear of horses)
finish at least one book
see my boys grown up and settled
find a man who is worthy of my love
finish my IT course
travel widely


8 things I often say

I suppose you can’t get home any other way
What homework have you not done ?
Use headphones we don’t all want to hear it!!
Hugs as always
You know where I am if you want anything
How much do you need?
I’m not playing the field anymore
I may not have any money but I am happier than I have ever been

8 Books I read recently

The Beachcomber - Josephne Cox
Trust Nobody - June Hampson (my writing tutor)
London – Edward Rutherfurd
The Quest - Wilbur Smith
Tease Me – Dawn Atkins
Sinners – Jackie Collins
Triumph of the sun – Wilbur Smith
Sex, lies and online dating – Rachel Gibson



8 songs that mean something to me

I’m not in love – 10CC
Lady in Red – Chris de Burgh
I just called to say – Stevie Wonder
Cherry Cola – Savage Garden
I will Survive – Gloria Gaynor
Whole Again – Atomic Kitten
All Woman – Lisa Stansfield
All your Attention – Daniel Bedingfield

8 Qualities I look for in a friend

compassion
humour
honesty
warmth
trust
intelligence
spirit
courage

8 people who I'm passing this on to

Dj Kirkby
Chopski
Emma
Her Indoors
Complex Girl
Wyld Cat
George
Cheekyfaces

I dont know where I am............ but thats ok

I have tried unsuccessfully not to think about forest too much while he is away.
I have tried to occupy myself
I have tried to remove him from my mind
I have tried searching dating sites for someone to replace him
I have chatted on msn
I have had text conversations
I have exchanged emails

I have not been frantic
I have not been in a panic
I have not been throwing myself at every available man
I have not been totally good
I have not been terribly naughty either
I have not kept Forest from my mind

In the past week I have had offers
Oxo asked me to visit him and stay over I declined
Fireman Sam has hinted and I said maybe
Fireman Sam has even asked me to play with him I declined
Rusty has teased me with his text
Rusty has requested a repeat of our previous meeting I can't decide
Do these men think that I am avoiding them personally

I want to keep occupied
I dont want to think
yet I feel disinclined to accept these offers
it isn't that I have gone off sex
It isn't that I am saving myself
I just don't feel in a space where sex is everything
I feel as though these offers are something I can take or leave
I am choosing to leave for the moment and just be here
I leave my boys while I indulge in pleasure often enough
for the moment I shall just be here with them

I am not feeling the peaks and troughs that go with passion
I am feeling serene and calm
no need to rock the boat
I am happy just chatting, texting and emailing
I am connecting with friends old and new
just being me

I am trying to work out what I want
I am trying to work out what I dont want
I am lost without emotion
but that is ok