Saturday 26 July 2008

Somebody

If this don’t bring a tear to your eye …..!

SOMEONE said...

Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby .
Somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "Normal," is history.











Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct ..









Somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.




Somebody said being a mother is boring ......






Somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.



Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will "turn out good."



Somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.



Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices .




Somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.




Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother.




Somebody never helped a fourth grader with her math.



Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as you love the first.









Somebody doesn't have five children.



S0mebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books .......


Somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears.




Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery ...........




Somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.









or on a plane headed for military "boot camp."




Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back .......



somebody never organized four giggling Brownies to sell cookies.




Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married ...




Somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.




Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home ....



Somebody never had grandchildren.




Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her .



Somebody isn't a mother.



Somebody driving one of these .................


is taking me out over the weekend

11 comments:

Vincent said...

Excuse my clumsy non-mother brain, but is this an entry for a non-sequitur competition?

Annie Wan said...

i'd like to shoot the somebody who told me i had to eat for two when i was pregnant ... and then when i was breastfeeding ...

Annie Wan said...

fortunately for them i'd forgotten who it was - it may possibly have been more than one person - and no jokes about maternal dementia please

Lady in red said...

Vincent although this does read in such a way it is merely here as I received it in my mail box at work and thought I would share it with my own little addition to see how observant my readers are.

Lady in red said...

Mei whilst nobody told me to eat for two somebody told me that cravings are fine as they are usually for an ingredient missing from your normal diet.

It was too late when somebody told me the only craving you shouldn't give into is sugar!!!! I had to have a jam donut everyday and if I couldn't it had to be something else with sugar on like kiplings country slices (box at a time). I had never had a sweet tooth before that.

Lady in red said...

Mei one of the midwives when I was in hospital (I forget which time) was telling one of the other mums that you lose 25% of you brain cells with each pregnancy......not much hope for the likes of you and I in that case.

Vincent said...

OK, plagiarism and non-sequitur. Anything else to confess whilst you are at it?

Anyhow, may your date live up to expectations; or live up to the opulence of his car anyhow. Will you tell all?

Vincent said...

Sorry, is it a girls only blog?

The penny just dropped: "If this doesn't bring a tear to your eye ..."

No, it brought a rise to my gorge. I come to this site for your beauty and English wit, not some regurgitated transatlantic sentimentality.

Lady in red said...

Vincent I don't do girls only blogs. Any kind of reaction is fine with me. It didn't bring a tear to my eye either but then I don't go all gooey over babies either.

However I don't like to stick to one easy recipe for my blog. I like to kep my visitors guessing what I shall be serving up to them next.

Having just completed a very different post over on battle I wanted a complete change in direction for this one.

I hope you will continue to enjoy my wit.

I am sure I shall tell some though not all ;-D

Vincent said...

Ah, having checked your "battle" blog enough for an overview of the theme of its latest post, I hastened back here, where the motto is "Make yourself comfortable". Phew!

Joanna Cake said...

Awwww... a lot of truths in there :)