Sunday, 11 January 2009

Meeting a clown

Over recent weeks I have had far more calls than I care to receive from SF.First there were the calls asking what to do about christmas. (Would it be alright to have the boys on boxing day).I might not want SF in my life any more but I am not going to stop our sons from seeing him if they so want. I don't see why he stil thinks it is nescessary to ask my permission to see them. They are all old enough to make up their own minds, and make their own arrangements with him. He isn't meant to contact me he is supposed to ring them directly. I would say that he has all their mobile numbers but JA often forgets to charge his phone and the others have all had new phones in recent months and not passed on their new numbers. Unfortunately he got my mobile number and our home land line number by accident when he borrowed a phone from ET. He promised he wouldn't be a nuisance which he isn't really but I could do without his calls that are never important or urgent.

Before christmas he called me asking to borrow some money. He keeps telling me that he is going to finish with his girlfriend. I don't need to know this it is nothing to do with me, I don't care who he lives with. However DC won't see him when J is there. He asked me if he could give our sons a post dated cheque for them to split between them for christmas.On Christmas Eve he called me at 5pm from the pub, he had earlier decided to catch the trai to Kent to visit his own family and would have the boys on sunday instead of boxing day. However now he couldn't afford the train fare. I was not going to lend him the money. On the sunday suprise suprise he couldn't see the boys because all he had was some ham and some instant mash. Later I asked OJ how he and his brothers feel when their dad lets them down like this. He says that they just accept it as he has always let them down all thier lives, making promises then on the day saying it will have to be another time. He has asked if he can borrow money from his own sons. They are now refusing to let him have any money because he spends it on beer and cigarettes.

Last week I was asked if he could give the a dinner on Sunday (today), a few days ago he asked if they would like to go to a local carvery for early bird dinners. Now today he is saying that instead of seeing them today he would see them on thursday and give them a buffet meal. It will be ET's 17th birthday on Friday his father tells me he is going to give him £20 on thursday so that I can have him at home on his birthday.SF got paid on Friday so it is that time of the moth when he pays me the £100 maintenance that I recieve every month from him. He called me this morning asking if I need that money yet. When I told him that I do need it so I can go shopping he asked when I am going shopping.

' Not until I get the money. '

'Can you do me a favour and give me and J a lift into Town to the cash machine then I can give you the money'.


'When will you be going?'

'Give me an hour'

'Oh I wanted to go now, would you be able to pick us up from The H******** ? so I can have a drink first or would The Mill be easier for you?'

Bloody cheek! So I kept him waiting by going to the local Tip first. But when I got to The Mill I nearly died when I saw them walking towards my car. With his baggy black and white striped cotton trousers with huge red and green patches at the knees. A tee shirt with coloured hoops (I didn't look very closely) an off white cotton blazer and a fedora.!!!

OMG hes turned into a clown all he needs are the big shoes and a flower that sprays water. She wasn't dressed quite so flamboyantly but was still quite a sight. I wanted to hide in case anyone saw me with them. They both talked non stop as I drove, making it hard for e to figure out what either of them were saying. J's speach is not very easy for me to understand (even on a good day) apparently she had a stroke some years ago and her speech was affected. That coupled with my hearing deficeincy doesn't help. Several times SF told J to stop talking. He was very rude to her.When I pulled up outside the Post Office I had to tell J to get out of the car so that SF could go to the cash machine. No sooner was she out of the car and she was gone trotting off towards the pub. I am sure that by the time he had climbed out of the car and reached the cash point she must have already reached the pub. Very strange!!


cheekydani said...

Holy cow. Not sure what else to say other than holy cow... poor Lady, having such a strange creature - or indeed two strange creatures - in your life. Thinking of you... x

Lady in red said...

Dani your comment did make me laugh thank you.

thank goodness I don't have to see either of them very often, but I m not suprised DC is reluctant to see them. My guess is that no matter how embarrassed the other boys are they will sill see him simply because he is their dad.

Fire Byrd said...

Now the phone call makes sense.... what a duo to put up with.
Thank goodness your sons have got their dad's measure.

Lady in red said...

lol Fire I didn't want to give away too much when we were chatting as it would have spoilt the story.

Rach said...

He just gets worse, as long as you got your money in the end darl, but what a sight to

Elaine said...

Grrrrrrrrrrr. MEN.

I hope he paid you. x

Mel said...

What a sad state of affairs for the kiddos.

Broken promises--gawddddd...I know he's caught up in the whirlwind, but good grief what he's doing to the kiddos....

*huge hugs*
I feel for ya...what a mess to have to deal in....

Mei Del said...

i bet you're more than relieved to be out of that relationship!

Anonymous said...