why

why is it that when I am away from my computer I come up with all sorts of things that I simply must blog.

but sat in front of my computer my mind goes blank.

I guess thats a bit like my current life really

lots of ideas and lots of choices but what do I end up doing?

very little!!

I go to work,

I cook, clean and shop for the boys,

I chat to some friends but not nearly as much as I used to do.

I write but not nearly as much as I had been doing

I blog but nothing like the amount I had become accustomed to doing

I go to the gym but not as often as I would like

I taxi my kids around

I dream

I make myself promises

I am content

but not satisfied

I think I am getting old

my eyes are begining to be affected

Have had my reading glasses for about 18 months but rarely use them unless my eyes are tired or I have a headache.

the last few days I have found myself peering at print from very close up to see what it says

today I have on my glasses for the first time in ages

I have done a couple of stupid things in the last few days

one I received a message on msn from one of my friends it gave a link showing my email address saying this looks familiar. I thought it looked dodgy but after a while of ignoring it curiosity got the better of me and I clicked on it. Nothing seemed to happen but I did notice after a while that chat windows were opening and closing rapidly. I soon realised I had licked on a virus. By this time it had been sent from my computer to some of my friends. I turned mine off and did a system restore. It appeared to be ok. Yesterday OJ was having a few problems so he tried to uninstall msn then reinstall he also did repeated system restores. It doesn't seem to have affected the pc in any way other than every now and then the mouse freezes and a couple of chat window flash open then its back to normal. As far as I can tell only a fe of my friends have been getting these messages. One or two people I have not spoken to in ages have said hello which has prompted m to have a clear out of my msn contacts. I have cleared out anyone who I either don't remember who they are or I have had them blocked long term or I just have had no contact with for many months. I have now reduced my contacts down from 145 to 81. There are still some there that I don't want to come back to haunt me.

The other thing that I really should have given more thought to was the ATM situation. If I had been thinking straight I could have given DC a cheque to pay for his Tyres and exhaust then I wouldn't have needed to go to the ATM and my PIN would still be ok and I would have access to my money. The other stupid thing about that was that I deliberately went to that ATM as the one closer to my home is unreliable and eats peoples card so I wont use it.

during this past week I had an opportunity to be a par of a threesome where both myself and the other woman would be the Master's slaves and who he would take great delight in spanking. I backed out of this. the idea had been good but I don't want to get involved in this.

I have also had many chats in recent weeks with Lotto. He wants me to meet him again soon.