Monday 16 February 2009

Failed

It would seem that I am an unqualified failure.

I tried .................. really I did

Day one was successful

Day two was on the way to a success right up until the last minute

Day three was a failure

or was it


Saturday I managed to keep him on his toes, not replying to him for hours, letting him think I was going out in the evening.


Sunday I didn't make any contact until the evening when he enquired if I had been to the gym. I let him know that I hadn't been there, instead I had indulged in some other fun excercise which resulted in me getting wet and he wasn't impressed when he got cramp in his foot. ............... no response to that. Whilst I had been out he had sent me an email about some naughty valentines cards, asking if I had received any like these. I just told him no none like that. Let him read into that whatever he chose.


Again I was holding out well

Until just before midnight that was

I know I should have held fast I almost made it

But in the end I just had to tell him

So just before midnight I sent the text ..............................


'meant to ask if you like swimming'


'I was wondering what you had been up to LiR...!'


Ok so I slipped in my resolve


But it was today that was my undoing


Every morning when I am at work I get at least one text, but not today

Nearly every day when I stop for lunch I find at least one joke email with a short message

Today was no different

Today there were two

The second one was one of those feel good messages

As I scrolled down to the end I found this line


'forgive quickly, kiss slowly'


So I replied that the email had told me to



'forgive you quickly and kiss you slowly ....................just don't do it again!! (next time send individual text messages)'


He couldn't figure out what I was talking about


So I told him that my phone had reveal all the numbers he had sent his hearts message to


'Ohhhh dear, didn't know it did that. Thanks for letting me know. That's a little embarrassing LiR, sorry..! If it's any consolation, I only got a reply from my niece, sniff, sniff..! Actually thats not true, I had a black stocking clad pair of sexy pins sent me..! xx'


I didn't hear from him again all evening until just before 10pm when he phoned me. We had a lovely chat, its great how we can talk about anything even when we don't agree. He apologised again for the text, thanked me for his telling off. He admitted that apart from me the others were all family. Yes I know he could be spinning me a line there, but from what I have gathered about him in the last two months, he is the kind of man who would do that for them. He talks about them a lot.


I did try to play the dating game (I did spend last night chatting to two new men), but I just can't play mind games. It just doesn't sit well with me. Ok so perhaps being honest doesn't always win the man, maybe they do like to be the hunter. But if I play the game as it should be played then I won't be being true to myself.


Maybe I am a failure at the dating game but I am still me and to my mind that is more important.

12 comments:

Sorrow said...

there a great many things that aren't easy, but worth it in the long haul...
Good for you.

Fire Byrd said...

Being true to yourself is the most impotant thing, along with of course a little bit of not been taken for granted. Think you're doing it just right.
hugs xx

DJ Kirkby said...

This was a great post, honest and significant for your furtue. Nice pic.

MarmiteToasty said...

Always be true to yourself :) - great post..

x

Dark Side said...

I completely agree with you, just go with what feels right...xx

Lady in red said...

Sorrow you are so right

Lady in red said...

Fire

Think you're doing it just right.

coming from you this means a lot to me

Lady in red said...

DJ thank you, I decided that if I follow the dating rules I would be pretending to be someone I am not.

Lady in red said...

Marmie that is something I try to do

Lady in red said...

DS it just didn't feel right doing it any other way

Mel said...

About time! ;-)

Always, always--to thine own self be true.

*hugs*

nitebyrd said...

Being true to yourself is the most important thing. Definitely.