Taking a break

I'm knackered!!
Ok so I have not been to the gym for a couple of weeks, ran out of time one Sunday then last Sunday I was busy helping Harvey, I thought it would be an hour or two, I was there for 6 hours sorting him out. He has thanked me but said that I had embarrassed him. It seems that he was not as cool with me being there as a platonic friend as he made out. either it didn't show or I just wasn't looking for signs. He is a nice guy but just not my intellectual equal. Fine for a quick fling (well 4 days is quick isn't? whilst not being a one night stand), but not a long term option.

I have been feeling fat all week probably due to the amount I have been eating in the last two weeks. I really want to not do this as I want to look my best when Romeo returns home. But I guess it has been the lack of having him there to talk to plus the stress of the last few weeks over DC and his precarious job situation, I have not felt the inclination to do the hours chatting and playing online so I have been reaching for food instead.....but I have been eating more at work too. So hopefully this unaccustomed exercise will help to burn off a few of these extra calories.

So what am I doing apart from trying to keep myself occupied? I am spring cleaning.
I am clearing out my house of as much clutter as I can manage. I am clearing out my internet stuff too. I have reduced my msn contacts to a more manageable number, getting rid of those I don't talk to anymore. Anyone who is connected to my days of being highly sexual apart from those who have become friends anyway including Forest. does it surprise you that we still chat? I am sure you would be surprised at some of the conversations we have although we steer clear of one subject. Oxo on the other hand is being petulant, he says hi, asks how I am and how work is going but then he will ask how my love life is or I going to visit him. When he doesn't get the reply he wants he just goes offline. I can't be bothered with his behaviour now if he doesn't want to be friends then he can go be miserable on his own.

I am sad that I ahve not heard from Romeo now for a week, but I am trying to be positive and be patient (I don't know how long for though). did I tell you that I could hear his voice in my head on Wednesday afternoon when I was walking through the warehouse. The odd thing about that apart from me hearing his voice as clear as anything but at that time he was online on the dating site. (I don't know how long for but that was the last time he logged onto the site). I am guessing he thought about me and as I was in a quiet place his thoughts came to me telling me that I will get through my problems as I am strong enough. I have just been clearing out all the old messages from my mail box on the dating site, I have saved all the ones to and from Romeo but got rid of the rest. In doing this I noticed that he has kept all of mine right from the very first apart from one about 6th from the start which he has deleted. this helps me to feel positive. In the last few days I have done a new tarot reading each day just to be sure. they have each been different but all have been positive telling me that my life is about to improve, I am about to be swept off my feet, I am strong and I need to be patient. I am about to fall in love unconditionally.

I received a phone call (or three) at work on Thursday, the Housing Association who own my home want to survey my house for asbestos. I thought the asbestos had been removed last year when the scaffolding was up. When the gutters etc were replaced. But no they want to invade my home for an hour this Wednesday, while they poke about checking every room for traces of asbestos. I have arranged for my mum to come over for the time they will be here as I can't afford to take the time off from work. Yesterday I brought home a box of 100 builders rubble sacks. I have told the kids they have to fill as many sacks as they can. This is a good time to have a thorough clear out. The sacks can then either be stacked in the garage or taken to the tip. I can see myself driving to the tip many times tomorrow. I also have a washing pile 4' high so gradually getting through that. I ahve been sorting out my clothes in my wardrobe so that my clothes go from left to right according to size 18/20 down to 14(all of which have fitted me at some point in the last 18 months.)

Now I suppose I have sat here long enough I am cold again so I best crack on (and crack the whip get those lads doing some more work).